


Fall of Giants

by QueenBookBuff



Series: The Scarlet and SJ Chronicles [6]
Category: That '70s Show
Genre: All of our Tomorrows Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, F/M, Father-Daughter Relationship, Father-Son Relationship, Future Fic, Gen, Grief/Mourning, SJ and Scarlet Chronicles, She Belongs to Me Universe, Twins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:41:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28123266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenBookBuff/pseuds/QueenBookBuff
Summary: Everyone's world is rocked when they lose the person who was always their guiding light. Hyde tries to hold Jackie and his family together as they mourn a person they thought would live forever
Relationships: Eric Forman/Steven Hyde, Jackie Burkhart & Red Forman, Jackie Burkhart/Steven Hyde, Red Forman/Eric Forman, Red Forman/Steven Hyde
Series: The Scarlet and SJ Chronicles [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1977190
Comments: 26
Kudos: 24





	1. The News

**Author's Note:**

> This took me a long time to write and edit. The grief in this story is based on my family's grief when I lost my Grandfather. Everyone handles grief differently, and I respect that my ideas may not be what you think or what you have experienced. Please know my thoughts on grief come from a personal place and experience. 
> 
> As for my feelings on Twins...... My husband is an identical twin, and my daughter's best friend is the boy half of girl and boy twins. I have spent a lot of time talking with them about "twinning" I also know this a unique experience for all twins, and my ideas are based only on what I know.
> 
> Losing someone you love is heartbreaking...... even when they are fictional

It had been years since Hyde had reached for the bottle when something was tough, but after hanging up the phone he went directly to the cupboard that was above the refrigerator. In that lonely cupboard, unreachable to half his house, he pulled out his old friend Jack Daniels. It would be unfair to say he had not had whiskey in all the years he had been married to Jackie, but he kept it to when he was out with Eric, and only one. He made a point to never take the bottle down from its home, unless they were celebrating something huge, and still he almost never did. It would be a flat out lie to say he didn’t love the taste of whiskey, because he did love it. The burn that came with whiskey and the warmth that followed was something he would always enjoy. Jackie hated it, always would, and he knew why. He was the why, and he respected that, sentencing the bottle to its lonely existence in the out of reach cupboard.

He grabbed a whiskey glass and poured himself a healthy splash. Hyde didn’t even hesitate, he threw back the drink and poured himself another one. The second shot lived only moments in the glass before it met its death in the back of his throat. As the whiskey burned his insides, Hyde squeezed his eyes as tight as he could. He took a deep shuddering breath. Hyde knew the man who raised him would expect him to not waver in the face of difficulty. He had promised Red all those years ago he would take care of Jackie, he would not fail her or Red now, not when it counted most.

He heard a car pull up in the drive, it was SJ. SJ had restored an old Mustang and damn did that baby purr. There was no mistaking it. He pressed his thumbs into his eyes. He didn’t want to do this either. He would do anything to not be the responsible person he had become, but he was, and he had expectations to live up to. He would not fail. He waited for his boy to wander in, so he could tell him that loving someone didn’t keep them with you forever.

* * *

SJ pulled into the driveway worn out by the day. School had been exhausting. The school was wild with rumors about Scarlet and Haze. Haze beating the crap out of that douche Michael Trever on Scarlet’s behalf and them be spotted around the school together had Madison High on fire. Like he said to his dad last week being, Scarlet’s brother could be exhausting. If one more person asked him if Scarlet and Haze were a  _ “Thing” _ he was going to lose his shit.

On top of that, he couldn’t get Scarlet’s friend AnneMarie out of his head. He could barely concentrate, he was so occupied by the thought of her. He was ready to sit with his guitar and play music until his mind was clear. He grabbed his shit, got out of the car, and walked into his kitchen to find his dad sitting with a bottle of Jack Daniels, and his head pressed into his hands.

“Dad?”

Hyde slowly raised his head, studied SJ, and for a minute was overcome by fierce love for his son. He got a deep satisfaction out of the fact that his son would never know the horrors of an abusive home. SJ had only ever known love and care from his parents. He didn’t know what life was like in a home where your parents hated that you existed. Hyde was only able to have a normal family and be a good dad due to Red Forman. He would probably be in jail or dead if Red had not kept him in line all those years. He knew for sure Jackie would have been a complete and total train wreck if Red hadn’t been like a father to her.

SJ was starting to get freaked out. His dad had a bottle of booze in front of him, and now he was just staring at him. He was used to silence as a form of communication with his dad, but this was a little much for even him. 

“Dad, whatever it is you better tell me before Scarlet and Mom waltz in the door. Drama Queen 1 and 2 can be a lot for one man to handle. You might need someone to deal with Scarlet.” 

SJ snarked hoping to get a reaction out of his dad.

Still, nothing. Now SJ was starting to get worried. This was more than his dad being quiet, this was shock. Something was wrong. Really wrong. His dad was rocked, and very little rocked his dad. He had only ever seen one thing shake his dad, and he refused to think about that.

“Dad, do I need to go get Uncle Eric?”

Hyde snapped back at SJ’s last statement. The very last thing he wanted was SJ to go over and talk to Forman. 

“No. I’m fine. SJ, I need you to come sit down with me.” He gruffed out.

SJ plopped his crap down on the counter, and dropped into the chair across from his dad. 

“What the hell is it?” SJ asked.

Fear was starting to climb in his stomach. It couldn't be his mom. He had witnessed his father when his Mom wasn’t okay, and that scene was something that still gave him nightmares. He shook his head and tried to block the image of his father brought to his knees, out of his mind.

“SJ. It’s not your mom.” Hyde whispered. 

He could see the enduring fear of losing Jackie creeping up his son’s face. For the rest of their lives he was confident they would fear anything serious was about them losing their mother. He shook off his own oppressive fear of his Doll being truly out of his reach. He had a task that must be done.

“SJ, right before you got home the phone rang. It was Grandma Kitty, your Grandfather is gone. He died while working on the Corvette. They think he had a heart attack.” 

He watched it hit his son, and for the millionth time he wished SJ wasn’t like him. He could see him shutting down. SJ was folding in on himself, burying his feelings quickly, so he couldn’t feel anything. 

“Stop SJ. Don’t do this to yourself. It’s okay to be upset. Red was the best man I’ve ever known.” 

SJ bristled. “You aren’t showing emotion, why should I?” 

Hyde let out a heavy sigh, 

“SJ, your mom is going to walk through that door, and I’m going to have to tell her the man who has been her father in every way but blood is dead. The man we all thought would live forever is gone. I’m going to need to be there for Eric ,and I’m going back to a house that witnessed some of the greatest moments of my life and the worst with your mom. I have to be strong. Red would expect it out of me. I won’t fail him SJ. I need you to feel, what you need to feel, and I need you to keep an eye on Jackson. Devon will watch over Heidi, but Jackson is going to need you.”

SJ wanted very much to be like his dad in this instance. He wanted to push it all down, but all he could see was the man who taught him the love of a car. Grandpa Red was the steady force in their family, and he didn’t know a world where there one person his father respected completely was gone. His Grandfather was the only human on earth his Dad step down for. Even more, Grandpa Red loved his mom more than anything. He became a different person when she was in the room. His mom was going to be shattered.

Before he could say anything else the sound of a car door shutting rang through the house like a shot from a gun. He looked at his dad, and saw him trying to ready himself. He could hear his mom and Scarlet chattering and laughing. It made him sick to think that in moments all the lightness would be pulled out of them. His mom was going to take all the strength his dad had. He would take one for the team, and tell Scarlet.

“Dad, let me tell Scarlet. You deal with mom.” SJ said quietly as the voices got closer. 

Hyde felt a swell of pride, but also didn’t want to put the burden on his son. 

“That’s nice of you to offer SJ, but I can tell your sister. You shouldn’t have to break her heart.”

SJ squared his shoulders “Dad, let me take care of Scarlet. She’s my twin. I know how to do this.”

Hyde sighed heavily. SJ drove him nuts, but he took immense pride in who he was becoming as a man. 

“Okay, but come get me if it is too much. He was your Grandpa too. I don’t want you shutting yourself off.”

He had more to say, but the words died on his lips because Jackie glided into the house. God, she was simply the most stunning woman on earth. She was absolutely lit up from the inside, and no matter how much time went by he was still blown away by her. He had done nothing to deserve this woman. As matter as fact, he had done everything he could to lose her, but by some miracle she loved him. He was going to break her heart one more time in the worst possible way. 

* * *

Jackie noticed it the minute she walked in the door. There in front of her husband was a bottle of whiskey. It made her stomach curl. The smell, the taste on his lips, and how it always seemed to dull her Steven, and show the Hyde she feared underneath. He almost never drank whiskey, and if he did it was almost never in the house. If that bottle was down in front of him, something was really wrong, because he would know that this would cause a fight. All her muscles were stiff when she asked,

“Steven? Why are you drinking?”

Before an answer could come, Scarlet came in behind her mother. Her bubbliness skipping over the kitchen. 

“Hey Daddy. Hey SJ! Oh, my goodness, what a day at school! AnneMarie and I perfected our flips off the pyramid. Everyone clapped and cheered and……….” 

The words died on her lips as she caught the tension in the air. Her mom and dad were staring each other down, and her brother was staring straight at her with a grim expression on his face.

“ScarJar lets go upstairs. I need to talk to you.” SJ said softly, urging her with his eyes not to argue. She started to, but he brought out the big guns. He repeated his request, but this time in the language they created when they were young. Their parents…. Hell no one had ever been able to figure it out, and they used it when they didn’t want anyone to understand what they were saying. 

“ScarJar we need to go upstairs, please don’t argue. It’s important.”

Scarlet had no defense against her brother when he used their language. It was one of their deepest connections. She sighed heavily and replied “Okay.” 

He reached out his hand to her, and she grabbed it. They were stepping out when SJ turned back, looked at their Dad and only said his name.

“Dad?” 

Hyde looked at his son and said, “I’ll be fine.” He was about to start with Jackie when she exploded.

“Steven Hyde you tell me what is going on right now! SJ is acting like he has to tell Scarlet terrible news. You’re drinking whiskey which you almost never do, and you certainly never do it in front of me.”

Hyde wanted to be anywhere but here. Hell, he would rather be across the street with Eric dealing with him, than tell Jackie. He closed his eyes, and called on every piece of strength he had. 

“I needed a little liquid courage. Doll, come with me out into the living room. I need to tell you something.” 

His voice was soft which was not his normal tone… ever. Something was wrong, and he was hesitating that meant it was serious. 

“Jacks, lets go and sit down.” He begged.

“Just tell me. You are scaring me Steven.” Jackie pleaded back.

He strode to her. He grabbed her tightly. “Baby, I have bad news.” He stopped. The words were stuck. He couldn’t get them out. He had said it to SJ, but somehow saying it to Jackie was going to make it tangible. He pulled her even closer.

Jackie couldn’t fathom what would cause him to act like this. Her mind was spinning with possibilities, and finally her mind latched onto one. 

“Are Eric and Devon okay? Jackson and Heidi?” she trembled out.

“Doll, Kitty called a little bit ago…” He whispered. As soon as he said Kitty he felt her go tense. He was going to continue, but she cut him off.

“No. Don’t you say another word.” She cried against his chest. Her mind rejected even the possibility of what Steven was about to say. 

Hyde pulled her tight and ripped off the bandaid “Baby, Red is gone. He died this afternoon.” 

A scream of pure agony ripped through the quiet of the Hyde House, leaving no doubt that a heart was broken.

* * *

SJ had barely lead his sister into his room, when his mother’s scream ripped through the house. It was the second worst sound he had ever heard in his life. Nothing would ever beat Scarlet screaming for their Dad when their mother almost died. He still had dreams reliving that moment, and he would do anything to erase that day. He watched his sisters eyes go huge, and turn to bolt down to their mother. He grabbed her quick and pushed her in his room.

“Let me go. Mom needs me. Let go!” she yelled as he held her tight. 

“Scarlet, Mom doesn’t need anyone but dad right now. Let Dad take care of her.” He whispered into her ear in their language, so she wouldn’t fight him. 

Her heart was pounding. She finally really looked at SJ. His eyes were strained, his face pale and his mouth set in a grim line. 

“Brudder what is it?” She watched him wince at being called Brudder. She reserved that for the most serious of moments or when her heart hurt deeply.

He took her hand and lightly started to rub it. He pulled her to his bed. He took a shaky breath in. What he let out rocked her all the way to her heart.

“Scarlet…… Grandpa Red died this afternoon. He’s gone. Grandma Kitty called Dad right before I got home from school. I’m so sorry ScarJar.” 

Scarlet felt like all the air had been sucked out of her lungs. She couldn’t breathe. Not her Papa Red. She was named after him. She had been toddling after him since she could walk. He taught her everything she knew about cars. He spoiled her endlessly and whenever he visited, they would take a walks together. 

“No! No! Not Papa Red.” 

She started pushing against SJ as hard as she could. The tears were coming hard and fast. Her mind couldn't make sense of it. Scarlet and SJ had contact with WB, and he was a good grandpa, but he wasn’t nearly as close to them as Red and Kitty. Grandpa Burkhart was gone. They had never met him and Grandma Burkhart was not allowed anywhere near them or their mother. As for her dad’s mom, she was altogether a forbidden topic. Uncle Eric, Aunt Devon, all the Formans were their family and at the center was Grandpa Red. 

Nothing in the world broke SJ more than his sister in agony. He held her close and rocked her back and forth. Between listening to her sob and his mother’s cries, his heart felt like it was being squeezed inside of a vice. 

* * *

Nothing could have prepared Hyde for watching his Doll break completely apart. He, himself had driven her to the edge of sanity and heartbreak, but Jackie in utter agony was something he wasn’t ready for. She simply screamed and then dropped. A lifetime of knowing every inch of Jackie’s body and being fluent in it’s secret language helped him know she was going to faint. He was able to grab her before she hit the ground. He scooped her up and cradled her in his arms. Hyde took her straight upstairs, and passed his son’s room. He knew that SJ would take Scarlet into his room. He paused a moment to see if he could hear what was going on. He could discern Scarlet’s soft tears, SJ murmuring to her in that damn language of theirs, but at this moment if it gave them comfort he didn’t care what language they spoke to each other. Satisfied SJ had his sister taken care of, he moved on to his and Jackie’s bedroom. 

He laid her on the bed, took her shoes off, and went to get her favorite jammies. If he didn’t want to punch something and fall apart simultaneously, he would have laughed at how he had been changing Jackie into her PJS as a way to comfort her since they were kids. Hyde undressed her, and slipped his tattered almost falling apart Zeppelin tee over her head. It was enough to bring her around, and as soon as she saw him she began to sob.

“Steven, it just can’t be true. Not Red. Not my Daddy.” 

Her tears were deep and wracking, if a heart breaking had a sound, this was it. It was the worst sound on earth. Jackie in any type of pain was torture for him, and he had never dealt well with her tears. Listening to Jackie call Red her Daddy was like someone had stripped his skin off and then put him inside of a pool of bleach. It burned painfully and it created an agony that was indescribable. Hyde was on expert of hiding his emotions, and standing strong in the face of shitty circumstances, but this time he was calling all he had to stay steady. 

“Doll Face, try to breathe. I don’t want you to make yourself sick.” he said softly while rubbing her back. 

He had his body curled around her, trying to absorb her pain into his heart. He had held Jackie in some of her worst and most desperate moments, but she had never clung to him like this. Hyde held her until her tears took all the life out of her, and she fell asleep. He made sure she was completely out, before he untangled himself. He took her favorite blanket, one that Kitty had made her and wrapped her tight. He leaned over, kissed her sweetly on the head, and stepped out to deal with the next storm.

Hyde moved down the hall, and lightly knocked on his son’s door. “Come in Dad,” SJ replied. 

There sat SJ with his back against the wall of his bed, just like every other time Scarlet was tearful, she had her head in her brother’s lap. Gazing at his Doll Baby, Hyde felt a lump form in his throat. The same as Jackie, she was asleep with tears stained on her face. She was like Jackie in so many ways, but the most, in the way she loved. He hated to see her face so pale and dejected. It broke his heart to see SJ so stoic, and trying so hard to keep it together.

“SJ, you doing okay?” Hyde gruffed out around the lump that was near choking him.

SJ could observe his dad was hanging on to his control but it was strained. He had seen his face, when he saw how Scarlet looked. It drove him crazy most of the time, but his dad couldn’t stand to see Scarlet sad. Between Mom breaking down, and Scarlet being upset, he knew that this was an emotional hell for him, even if he would rather die than admit it.

He was going to do everything he could to help ease the load his dad was carrying even if it meant pushing everything he felt into the deepest corner of his heart. 

“I’m okay” SJ finally answered. He looked at his dad and asked what was pressing on his heart. 

“Mom?” 

Hyde sat down on the bed next to Scarlet’s feet, and attempted to put into words what SJ was asking. He stared straight ahead. Hyde didn’t think he could handle looking into SJ’s eyes right now. 

“She’s asleep, but when she wakes up, I except her to break again. She loved your Grandfather, like no one else. This is your mother’s father, her real one…. Not that bastard who gave her life. It’s going to take her awhile to feel steady again. How’s Scarlet?”

SJ sighed, his voice almost breaking. “She’s pretty upset, but I’m expert in talking ScarJar off the cliff. I got this Dad. Let me take care of her. You focus on mom and Uncle Eric.”

Hyde nearly lost it. His son trying so hard to be strong for his family was clawing at Hyde’s already rocked heart. His pride and worry for his son, caused him to do something, he hadn't done in years. He took one arm and grabbed SJ close.

“Thank You, SJ. I appreciate what you are trying to do, but I need you to promise me that if you need me that you will come get me. He was your grandfather too, and I don’t want you pushing down how you feel. You know how I feel about keeping your word, so I am asking you to give me your word of honor if it gets to be too much, you will tell me.” 

SJ like his dad was on the edge, but didn’t want to fail at what he regarded as his mission, and that was to help his dad by being strong.

“I promise Dad” and he meant it, but SJ would do everything he could to make sure his sadness wasn’t added to the load his dad was carrying.

Hyde stood up, and walked to the door. “I need to go check on your Uncle. Keep an eye on your mother. I need you to call me as soon as she wakes. SJ…. I know how much you love your mom, but you have to let me take care of her. Like you said about Scarlet, I’m an expert on calming your mom. I don’t want you in her path when she freaks the fuck out, because SJ…… she is going to flip at some point, and it’s not your job to deal with that.”

SJ simply nodded. He watched his dad stand up, square his shoulders, take a deep breath and center himself. It was at that moment that SJ understood what an incredible man his father was. His father would shoulder it all, at the price of his own heart. 

  
  
  



	2. I Just Can't Do It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eric can't bring himself to do what needs to be done. Hyde steps in and leads the way into a new life without Red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Everyone,
> 
> This Chapter is really short, I didn't like how it connected to the next section, so I made it into a separate chapter. 
> 
> I reference Whiskey a lot in my stories. While I am not a big drinker myself, my Irish family loves a good glass of whiskey. If I am honest, I occasionally enjoy a glass of Jamieson myself. 
> 
> Devon, is based of my Auntie, who is the most gentle soul on earth. You can't help but feel better in her presence. 
> 
> As I said before.... Grief is incredibly personal, and I write based on what I have experienced. Much of this is based on losing my Grandfather, Red and my Grandfather had very similar personalities.
> 
> I want to say that if you are looking for happy, this story is not for you, but the next SJ and Scarlet Chronicle is going to be happy and take us back to some of the best Hyde and jackie reflected in their kiddos.

Hyde crossed the street to Forman’s house, and pondered what in the hell he was going to say. He could take care of his Doll without thinking. He liked to think that he was built in some special way to understand Jackie. He had been taking care of her since he first found her bleeding on the sidewalk. He even felt decently prepared to help Kitty when they got together for the arrangements. He had to use the word arrangements, because he wasn’t prepared to think of words that gave a finality to this nightmare. However, Hyde didn’t know what to say to Eric, but at the very least he could check on Devon and the kids. He trudged back to the kitchen door, exactly as he would have at the old house, and knocked. It was only a courtesy knock, they had been wandering in and out of each other's houses for years. What he saw made him sick, there at the kitchen table was Forman with a glass and a bottle. He walked straight to the table, and sat down.

“Hey Forman.” he said casually.

Eric looked up from the bottle, he had been staring at like it was his salvation, to his oldest and best friend. He knew Hyde would come, he had been waiting. He assumed that as soon as Hyde settled Jackie, he would be over. At that thought, he felt the tears welling up again.  _ Jackie…  _ He knew there was no way she was taking this well, it gave him a weird sense of relief to focus on someone’s else pain rather than the gaping hole in his own chest.

“How is she?” he mumbled.

Hyde sighed. He wasn’t going to push Forman. Hyde understood not wanting to talk about things until ready. If ever there was someone who was sympathetic to that method it was him.

“She’s not good. I expect it will get worse before she actually calms down. Don’t worry about Jackie, Forman…. I got her covered. How are Devon and the kids?”

Eric was grateful for once Hyde was reserved in his emotions. It had driven him crazy more than once Hyde’s habit of closing himself off, but right now he needed someone to be calm, collected and cool. He needed Hyde. He needed Hyde’s cool and rock solid nature.

“Jackson is a wreck. I expect at some point he will wander over to talk to SJ, or I’m going to wake up to SJ crashing in Jackson’s room. Heidi is upset, and I anticipate she will cling to my mom when we see her. You know how close she is with Mom. Devon…. Well, you know, Devon, she is a total rock. She’s like you… she won’t break while I need her.”

Eric fell silent. He had yet to make eye contact with Hyde. He didn’t want to see it in his eyes. He didn’t want to see Red Forman gone. Hyde was a master at hiding how he felt, but Eric was fairly confident even he couldn’t disguise the loss of a man who had been such an enormous shadow in all their lives. 

Hyde didn’t say anything. He decided the best thing he could do was just sit with Forman, and keep him company by simply by being there. He was worried about Eric drinking. He wasn’t a drinker to begin with. Sure he had a beer here and there but heavy booze… almost never. That was his poison. If they went out to get a drink, Eric always got a beer, and he tended to get hard liquor of some sort. Hyde was fairly certain the bottle in front of Forman was for him when Hyde came over and would have a Jack and Coke. The only time he had ever seen him go for whiskey was when Devon lost their baby girl. Hyde hadn’t allowed it then, and he wasn’t going to let Forman do it now. 

Eric felt like he was being suffocated. It never occurred to him that there would a time that Red didn’t reign supreme or loom large in his life. He was Red Forman, he was supposed to be invincible. He felt like his whole world had flipped on its access. He had responsibilities to take care of. He needed to get to his mom, help her arrange details for the funeral, comfort his own family, and he had to find some fucking way to find his bitch of a sister. The mere idea of doing any of those things, made him physically ill. If he did those things, then it was true, it meant that Red Forman was actually gone. He couldn’t do it. He grabbed the glass, threw back the shot, and let it burn the agony away. He closed his eyes, and came to a conclusion. He knew how Hyde could help. It was a lot, but he had never needed something as much as what he was about to ask.

“I can’t do it, Hyde. I can't help my mom. I can’t make phone calls. I can’t. Just can’t. I’m begging you. I’m asking you to step in. I need you to be my brother.” 

Getting the words out of his throat was breaking the seal, and the tears finally started to come. He dropped his head to his arms on the table and began to cry.

Hyde closed his eyes briefly at the sight of a man who was more to him than a friend, break in half. There was almost nothing he wouldn’t do for Eric. He could do this, and would without hesitation. He stood up, grabbed the bottle, strode straight to the sink and dumped the grief dulling siren. He stepped back to Forman, put his hand on his shoulder and squeezed.

“I’ve got this. Don’t worry about anything.” He said with as much meaning as he could in his voice.

“I am going to go get Devon, and then I need to go back across the street and check on Jackie.”

He stepped into the living room to find Devon. Devon Forman was a gentle light, and she was perfect for Eric. She gazed at her husband’s best friend, and knew better than to say a word. She reached up on her tippy toes, and kissed him on the cheek.

“I’ll take care of him.” Before he could respond, Devon wrapped her arms around him and hugged him. Devon was one of the rare people Hyde allowed to touch him. She was one of the rare he showed open affection for. He had an incredible soft spot for this gentle soul, and he rarely bothered to hide it. 

Hyde hugged her back as he fought the tears waging a war to spill out of his exhausted eyes. He took a second to simply rest in Devon. 


	3. Patterns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one knows Jackie like Hyde does. Using a lifetime of experience with the woman he loves, he holds firm against her pattern of behavior when she is out of control.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first part of the story is written in the initial hours after they find out Red is gone. That is why it focuses pretty much on just the Hyde house. We will get back to Eric when they go home to Point Place, and Kitty will have her own chapter.
> 
> This section references heavily the She Belongs to Me Universe where I talk about Jackie not eating when she is upset.

Jackie woke to a room that had surrendered to the night. For a minute, she was confused to why she was in bed. She glanced down at herself, and didn’t remember changing in to Steven’s Zeppelin Tee Shirt. Jackie briefly wondered if her disorientation was due to a migraine, some times when she had a bad one she was confused right after she woke up. She closed her eyes taking stock of how her body felt, and didn’t discern any other signs. As her brain worked down its mental checklist, reality came pushing through like a train off the track. 

Her breathing immediately stuttered as she choked out “Red” 

Her heart was having none of it, and rebelled at the idea that he was gone. She jumped out of bed and rushed out of her room. She flew into the kitchen to find Steven sitting at the table writing what appeared to be a list. Jackie knew in an instant what he was doing, and felt bile rise in her throat. Unreasonable rage came rushing to the surface. How dare he be so calm! How dare he make plans for Red’s…. She shut her eyes tight at the idea of the end of her thought. 

“Steven James Hyde! What the hell do you think you are doing?” she yelled.

Hyde’s head snapped up, and found his wife standing in front of him half dressed and having the start of a melt down. He knew this was coming. Jackie’s reaction after her initial tears was always to get hysterical when she was agitated. He had seen this show before, been the target, calmed and weathered this storm many times in his life. He called on his patience because he knew it was about to be tested.

“Jackie, I need you to calm down. Eric asked me to help Kitty with details, and there is a lot to do before we leave for Point Place in the morning.” He kept his voice soft and non combative.

Jackie’s insides curled, at his words. She would not stand for him to make arrangements. She was not having it, because that would mean he was really…… she forced herself again to abruptly stop her train of thought, and to focus on being mad at her stupid husband.

“Stop it! You stop it right now. I’m not having it. There is no need for this.” The minuscule part of Jackie that was still reasonable knew that everything Steven was doing was necessary, but that small part was drowned out by her tidal wave of grief.

Hyde got up, strode to her, and grabbed a hold of her. She was trembling with emotion. Hyde was waiting for it to spill over into tears again. Jackie started to struggle against him, and she brought our her claws. She was going to make sure he hurt as bad as she did.

“You are such a bastard. How can you sit there so calm? How can you act like nothing is wrong? I hate this part of you. You never gave a damn about him.” 

Hyde knew Jackie meant none of it, but her words,when he was barely holding it together by the skin of his teeth, hurt like hell. There was only one way to deal with Jackie like this, and he brought out what she hated most. He brought out Hyde.

“ _ THAT IS ENOUGH! _ I will not tolerate you telling me how I feel or don’t feel Jackie. I love you, but you need to get it together. You aren’t the only who is hurting. Stop yelling at me right now. Or I guarantee you will not like the result!” 

He said it sternly with a tone of utter coldness. It was the only thing that would break through to her. He hated being this way, but he had to get her to a somewhat rational place.

Jackie felt his words lash over her. They cut through her hysteria instantly. It cracked open the angry, and a tsunami of grief came pouring back out. She collapsed into him, and let her heart burst into her safe harbor.

Hyde felt her give into her heartbreak, and the hysteria fade away. This is why he wanted SJ nowhere near Jackie when she exploded. He knew she would be unreasonable and hurtful. Jackie vicious when her feelings were out of control. A life time of fighting her when both of them were at their worst, had made him a combat veteran. He didn’t want that for SJ and He didn’t want that for Jackie.

Hyde knew that Jackie would be mortified after she was herself again if she treated SJ poorly. When her knees went weak, he scooped her up and carried her back up the stairs for the second time. As he rounded the corner to enter the hallway outside of their room, he came face to face with SJ. He watched his son’s face go pale at the sight of his mother. Every bit of love he had for her crossed his face in seconds. SJ started to speak, but he watched his father shake his head no. He understood instantly this was not the time. His dad moved into their room, and finally spoke

“SJ, please close the door behind me. I’ll be in here for a while. Why don’t you and Scarlet go keep Jackson company.”

He did what he asked. For just a moment he leaned against the door and listened to his mother weeping brokenly. He felt tears sting his eyes, he had no idea how his father could stand it.

* * *

Hyde was exhausted. He had gotten Jackie through the initial storm of hearing the news, her inevitable melt down, and the next wave of unfathomable grief. He was laying on their bed propped up. Jackie was curled on his chest with the second half of her body laying between his legs. The room was silent but for the quiet murmur of tears that had gone from wild grief to silent pain. He would do anything to make this stop. Someone wanted his Camino? _ Take it. _ Beat his ass? _ Sign him up _ . Sell his soul to the devil?  _ He would do it without a second thought.  _ Hyde hated that he could do nothing but hold her. What he did know was that Jackie had a fixed pattern when she was upset, and that pattern had attributes he wouldn’t stand for.

“Jacks, I’m going to get up and make you something to eat.” He said it softly, but his voice was stern. He was hoping that she would catch his tone, and for once in her damn life she would just listen. 

“I’m not hungry.” Her voice stubborn, laced with an edge.

Hyde rolled his eyes in the dark room. He didn’t know what he was thinking. Nothing was ever simple with Jackie. She called him stubborn, but she was the damn world champion of having to have her way. 

“Jackie….” he said with warning.

Jackie felt her unreasonable rage and the need to strike out return. She didn’t want to eat. The part of her that was Jackie down to her core wanted to saddle up and go a round with him. It sounded better than dealing with this wave of endless hurt, about losing the one man who never failed her.

“Don’t even start with me. I’m not hungry. Stop being a bully. You aren’t in charge of me. I’ll eat when I want to, not when you tell me.”

Hyde could deal with a lot when it came to Jackie. Being with her all these years, he had extreme patience for her and her still often demanding ways. Jackie was born a princess, and princess she still sometimes acted, but this one area he had NO tolerance. He would never indulge or have patience for her hurting herself in any way.

Hyde pulled out from under her, stood up, and pulled her chin into his hand. His eyes bore into his Jackie, and he laid it on the line. 

“We aren’t doing this. You will eat. I don’t give a damn if you aren’t hunger. I will not tolerate or allow you to hurt yourself by not eating. It won’t bring Red back and it won’t solve a fucking thing. I’ll shove it down your damn throat if I have to Jackie Hyde, but if you think I’m going to back down on this than you have lost your damn mind.”

Nothing about his tone suggested she argue with him, and his face didn’t have an ounce of moveability. She knew even in the depth of her grief that he wouldn’t budge on this topic. 

Hyde watched her eyes relent. He could see she hated it, and was less than pleased with him at the moment, but he didn’t give a damn. Her health and safety would always trump anything else. He softened his tone when he asked,

“What comfort food do you want Doll? Eggs? Toast? I’ll make you one of my secret awesome Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches if you want. Let me take care of you, Jacks.”

She closed her eyes against all the love pouring out of his eyes. She knew she was being crazy, and guilt was starting to creep up. He was shouldering a lot, and she knew he would do anything for her. 

“How about eggs and toast? Scarlet and SJ love your eggs as well.” 

Hyde sighed in relief, kissed her forehead, and sweetly said “Why don’t you go shower and I’ll cook dinner and check on the kids.”

He strode down the stairs, and for just a minute let himself silently grieve before shutting it back down. He had people to take care of. 


	4. Versions of Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Hyde continues to hold the ship steady, SJ and Scarlet listen to their hearts and find comfort in the hands of those who hold their hearts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter might seem strange that SJ and Scarlet finding comfort in people they are just starting to fall in love with. However, this chapter is 100 percent based on a real life experience. 
> 
> When I was dating my husband, we had gone to visit his brother about 4 hours from where we live. I called home to check in with my parents to find out My beloved Grand Da had died unexpectedly. I was crushed. My husband then boyfriend packed us up, and drove me straight home. I was falling apart and so was my family. He called all my professors for me to tell them I would be out of town, helped pack my bag, and took me and my family to the airport at 6 AM. I knew from that moment on.... he was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. That was 20 years ago. He continues to be my rock. 
> 
> Gra is love in Gaelic, and is a phrase my family uses and we use Da for Dad or Grandpa.
> 
> Parts of this story are deeply personal, and all I can say is I still miss my Grandfather. He was a tremendous man, and my family was never the same. 
> 
> This is story is dedicated to you Grandpa, from you I learned how to tell stories.

  
  


The House was finally quiet. Hyde could take a second to breathe and try to process what to do next. He had spent the evening watching his family like a hawk. He practically counted every bite both Scarlet and Jackie took. Scarlet could be just as unhealthy as Jackie about eating when upset, and hell would fucking freeze over before he allowed her to be her mother in this area. He had spent sometime with Scarlet on the couch watching her favorite movie. It made him smile his little girl was still inside the woman she was becoming. Scarlet loved the movie Beauty and the Beast. It was what she watched to comfort herself, and this time was no exception. Hyde had sat on the couch with her, snuggled up to his side and watched with her. In a moment of purely brotherly devotion, SJ had joined them. Which was hilarious because SJ hated the movie with an unrelenting passion, but he sat on the other side of his sister like a royal guard protecting his queen. 

After showering and eating, Jackie had taken a sleeping pill and gone straight to bed. He had been checking on her periodically, but she hadn’t even moved. This gave him time to pack their bags for tomorrow, and make sure the kids were getting what they needed put together. He was back at the kitchen table trying to make sense of his next steps. Hyde knew he needed to get some sleep, or he would be no good to his family, but sleep eluded him. So here he sat, trying to calm his mind before attempting to sleep. His peace was disturbed by the fall of soft footsteps. He knew before he even checked, who it was. 

“SJ, it's late, why aren’t you sleeping?” Hyde asked without even looking up.

SJ came into the kitchen that was only lit by the soft light from over the sink. His dad had a glass of whiskey on the rocks, and he could mentally hear his mom being pissed. He didn’t know what his mom’s problem was with his dad drinking whiskey in the house, but it was a bone of contention. SJ thought it was odd. He in his whole life had never seen his dad even come close to drunk. He had heard a million times about his dad being hell on wheels when he was younger, maybe it was connected to that. His mom and dad’s history got referenced a lot, but there were gaps or what appeared to be hesitation in the whole story. He realized his thoughts had drifted off, when his dad spoke.

“SJ? What’s up? It’s late, you need to sleep.” 

SJ moved to the chair across from his dad, and plopped down. 

“I can’t sleep. I know it's late dad, but I need something. It’s important.” 

Hyde’s general focus snapped to sharp. It was rare for SJ to come to him for something, and even rarer for him to emphasis something being important. He knew SJ got sick of hearing it, but he was like him in almost every way. It wasn’t SJ’s nature to ask for help, not from Jackie, not from Jackson, not even Scarlet, and most certainly not him. 

“SJ, it’s 1 o’clock in the morning. I’m not sure what you need but it might need to wait until morning.”

SJ took a deep breath. He knew his dad wouldn’t budge unless he was utterly upfront, and even then he wasn’t sure his dad would go for what he was about to ask. 

“Dad, I want to go see AnneMarie.”

He watched his father already start to shut the notion down, but SJ plowed on.

“Listen, I know it's late. I know I shouldn’t go try to get a girl that I’ve just started to sort of see out of her house in the middle night. I know if someone did that with Scarlet, you would lose your mind, but dad…. I need to see her. We have a date tomorrow night, and I want to explain.”

He observed his father’s face start to soften a bit, and he was a bit shocked by it. Soft and his father were not something he usually dealt with. His dad let out a heavy sigh,

“SJ, call her in the morning. Hell get up at dawn, and go knock on her door, but you can’t go to her house in the middle of the damn night. Because you are right, if I caught a guy trying to get you sister out of the house in the middle of the night, I would kill him.”

Everything is dad was saying was reasonable, but he needed this. He didn’t know exactly why, but his heart was desperate to see her and explain. 

“Please Dad, I can’t explain it, but I feel like I need to tell her, see her, and make sure she doesn't think I’m ditching her.” 

SJ steeled himself, and threw out the biggest roll of the dice in his life. 

“Come on Dad, are you telling me you never snuck out to go see Mom. From everything, I’ve heard, it wasn’t uncommon for you to spend the damn night with her, long before she was your girlfriend. I’m asking you to understand, please.”

  
  


Hyde bit back an oath. God, this kid was smart, too smart for his own good. How did he argue what he himself did a million times? He spent most of his life sneaking into Jackie’s bedroom, or her sneaking into the basement. Hyde pushed every instinct as a father to the side, and tried to remember how he felt when he needed to see Jackie, and how almost nothing could stop him from getting to her. 

“SJ, I swear to God if you get caught and I have to come bail you out, I’m kicking your ass. Don’t you dare do something that I would kill a guy for doing with your sister. Go. Tell her whatever the hell you need to say, and get your ass back in the house. Don’t make me regret this.”

SJ felt a grin spread across his face for the first time since he heard his grandfather had died, he felt lighter. He jumped up, hugged his dad, and bolted out of the house. 

Hyde poured himself another drink, and hoped to hell and back he just did the right thing.

* * *

SJ drove to where he knew AnneMarie lived. He had dropped Scarlet off here a few times. He killed the engine and coasted to the curb. His car was loud and the sound of the engine was unmistakable. He knew it was creepy, but he knew where her bedroom was. He had heard Scarlet talking on the phone, and mentioned she was jealous of AnneMarie’s walk out patio. He prayed that he wasn’t about to be arrested or killed by an angry father.

He moved as quietly as he could to the back of her house, to where he figured her room might be, and he recognized the patio instantly. He could appreciate why Scarlet was envious. It had comfortable looking chairs, a small table and it was surrounded by huge pots of flowers. It screamed AnneMarie, and it would appeal to his sister. He took a deep breath, and knocked on the glass door. __

_ “Please God, don’t let her dad hear me.”  _ He begged inside his head.

Just when he was going to knock again, the curtains blocking the glass door flew to the side, and there she was. It was the second time he had seen her in pajamas, and he had the same reaction. It simply wasn’t right that a girl could look so sexy and cute simultaneously. Her face was a perfect picture of shock. 

The sliding glass door flew open, and she hissed at him. “What in the hell are you doing here?”

AnneMarie wasn’t a stranger to knocks on her bedroom door from the outside. Her brothers found this a convenient way to come in and out when they didn’t want their father to know they had been out most of the night, but she sure as hell never expected to find the guy she was half in love with on the other side. 

SJ tried to look like he was sorry, but he wasn’t in the least. “Listen, I know it's late, and I am really sorry, but I needed to see you. It’s an emergency.” 

AnneMarie felt her blood go cold. Sadly, she wasn’t a stranger to the middle of the night horror stories. The worst moment of her life came in the darkest hours of the night. Her mind went instantly to Scarlet. She liked Scarlet and felt an instant bond with her. She didn’t think her heart could cope with it, if something had happened to her. 

She instinctively reached for SJ, “Scarlet? Is she okay?” SJ noted the instant fear and felt awful. He didn’t even consider she would think Scarlet was hurt or in trouble. He quickly reassured her, hating that look on her face.

“Scarlet is okay, but our family is having an emergency. My Grandfather died this afternoon, and we are leaving early tomorrow morning. I didn’t want to bail on you with just a phone call.”

SJ realized saying it out loud that it was ridiculous that he couldn’t have merely called her. They had not even had a real date, this was going to be there first. He didn’t know how to explain his overwhelming need to just see her. It scared the hell out of him. 

AnneMarie felt her heart go soft at his words. She examined his face, and she could recognize stress, pain, hurt, and something for her she couldn’t completely read but it was warm and it made her heart feel cozy. 

“Sweet, you are  _ grà _ ” she whispered. “Wait here” He had no clue that she had just called him love, in Gaelic. 

He watched her go back into her room. SJ had no idea what he was doing or what was supposed to happen next, but being her sphere made him feel like he was on steadier ground. She came back out, wrapped in a huge quilt and sat in one of the patio chairs. She gestured for him to sit in the other one.

“I’m sorry you lost, your Grand Da. It hurts to lose such an important person. My Da was devastated when my Grand Da died. It was sweet of you to worry about my feelings.”

Her Irish lilt traveled over him like a wave of comfort. In a moment of rare openness, he dropped his head into his hands and told her what was circling in his mind.

“I didn’t want you to think you weren’t important. I know it must sound crazy that I’m here when a phone call could have accomplished the same thing, but I felt like I needed to see you. I’m sorry if this is incredibly creepy.”

Whatever part of her heart, AnneMarie had not already given him the night she heard him sing, tripped over into his hands. He made her feel things she didn’t have words for. Her mom had told her that when she first saw her Da, that it was  _ Draíocht _ . 

In her language that meant magic, and that was what she felt when she heard him sing. AnneMarie would always believe the song was for her, he just wasn’t prepared for her listening to his heart. It wasn’t her nature to hold back, and her heart was already his, so she followed what it told her to do.

She got up out of the chair, moved to him, and said “Steven?” He glanced up at her, and she plopped herself in his lap, and wrapped her arms around him. She hugged him with her heart,

“I’m so sorry, you lost someone important to you.” AnneMarie held him tight, and she felt him relax into his arms. 

SJ was shocked when she plopped herself in his lap, and floored when she wrapped herself around him. He could literally feel her comfort radiating through her into him. Almost against his will he leaned into her. His heart only said one word  _ “This”  _ He needed her. He needed this. He pulled her tight, buried his face in her red locks, and let himself experience all the emotions of the day. SJ, finally kept his promise to dad, and released his own grief. 

After a while he pulled back, and gazed into those emerald green gems, and brushed her hair to the side. His heart was pounding, he could grasp everything she felt for him radiating out of her. He didn’t drive over with this intent, but he couldn’t stop himself. He leaned in and kissed her soft lips, and his whole world shifted. He knew he had to go or his dad would loose it, he shifted and kissed her cheek this time and softly whispered to her.

“Thank You, Annie.” She smiled brilliantly. His kiss had melted her, and hearing him call her Annie made her want to stay on his lap forever. 

“I have to go but I’ll be thinking of you. I’ll call you when I get back.” 

She slipped off his lap. He watched her walk back in the house, and headed back to his car. 

He didn’t know how it was possible to feel this way so quick for someone, but he was pretty sure he was in love AnneMarie Murphy.

  
  


* * *

While SJ’s world was changing, Scarlet herself lay awake in her bed. She had startled awake when SJ had left his room. She was twinning. Scarlet feel his pain inside her own heart. She could feel his unrest, and she was tempted to get up and follow him. Years of knowing her brother told her to let him go, until he wanted to talk. He would eventually talk with her, but pushing SJ was futile. It only made him dig deeper. Still, now she was uneasy, and her heart was sore with loss. She rolled over and looked at the clock. An idea popped into her head, and much like her mother she jumped in with both feet, and hoped for the best.

  
  


Haze could say with certainty that his phone rang almost never, and at 1 o’clock in morning. He could count on one hand how many people actually had his phone number. He only had the phone for work, so they could call him in and if on the off chance he had an emergency. He had just settled into bed, after a long shift at the warehouse. Haze had planned to read for a while to try to get the girl who wouldn’t get out of his head to quiet down and then crash. He reached for the phone, mystified.

“Hello?”

On the other end, Scarlet couldn’t help but smile at his deep but warm voice.

“Haze, it’s me Scarlet.”

Haze almost dropped the damn phone. Of all the voices he expected to hear on the other side of the phone, it wasn’t hers. He was shocked, he had barely given her the number this afternoon. He had only given it because of Homecoming. He didn’t realize he had not replied because she asked 

“Haze? Are you there?”

He stumbled out, “I’m here.” true to his nature, he was straightforward with her. “Not to be rude, but why are you calling me at 1:00 clock in the morning?”

Scarlet felt her cheeks go flush, and her body heated up in embarrassment. She inwardly groaned.  _ What the hell was she thinking? _

“I’m so sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking. I am being rude. I’ll talk to you later.”

Haze wasn’t stupid. A girl like Scarlet didn’t call in the middle of the night for no reason. He could hear something in her voice. She was upset, and she had called him. He couldn’t help but be stupidly pleased by it. He stopped her from hanging up.

“Scarlet, what is it?”

She didn’t know what to do but blurt it out. “My grandpa died, and I couldn’t sleep.”

Haze felt his heart squeeze. He didn’t like the idea of her hurt or unhappy, and he could hear it positively vibrating off of her. He softened his tone, 

“Oh Tiny, I’m sorry. I know you said you really liked him. I think you said he was the one who taught you about cars.”

Hearing Haze mention the cars, flashed a montage of memories of her grandfather in her mind, and she started crying again. 

He heard her start to weep, and had no idea what to do. Tears in general put him on edge, but he certainly didn’t know what to do about tears from a girl he had liked forever, and that he couldn’t fix or do anything about. He gripped the phone tightly, and tried to give her some sort of comfort.

“Baby, please don’t cry. I’m so sorry. I know it's hard to lose someone you love.” Briefly his mother’s face drifted into his mind, but he shut that down right away. This wasn’t the time for his fucked up life. 

Scarlet didn’t know what she was trying to accomplish, but she felt compelled to tell him she would be out of town for a while. 

“I’ll be gone for a few days. I just wanted you to know.”

Haze sighed. Her voice sounded so small and sad, and he hated there was nothing he could do. 

“Okay, Tiny. You can call me if you need a break from everything.”

She smiled slightly from her end. “Thank You, Caleb. I hope you have sweet dreams.”

Scarlet hung up the phone, and nestled down in her bed. She closed her eyes, letting his voice in her mind lull her back to sleep.

Across town in a sparse and lonely apartment, Haze was shocked. She had called him Caleb. It had been years since he had been addressed by his first name. He hated his first name. He was named after his fucked up father, but hearing his name on her lips was the sweetest sound he had ever heard. He closed his eyes and repeated the truth that he had pondered when he first started to tangle with her. He was one hundred percent fucked. That girl already owned him. 

Haze sighed, turned off the light and fell asleep thinking of her. He couldn’t have sweeter dreams than that. 


	5. Your Life Doesn't Belong To You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kitty lays in bed and faces the cold reality of life without Red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what else to say other than this was very difficult to write, and is short. I tried to put myself in Kitty's shoes, and found that it is a world I don't even want to imagine. I can't even begin to pretend to understand the grief of losing the love of your life. It is a world that I pray will never be mine.

Kitty lay in her bed, and for the millionth time in the last 48 hours, she let her hand glide across the cold sheets next to her. She kept thinking if she reached out, she would feel the warmth of a body next to hers. She kept thinking she should be able to reach out, and touch the man she knew by heart. Instead, she felt empty space, and sheets that didn’t have a body to warm them. Her bed would never be full again. Kitty quickly pulled the pillow on the empty side and buried her face in it. She could still smell him. It gave her a quick moment of ease, before the darkness of reality fell upon her. Eventually, his smell, his voice, the memory of his touch would fade and Red would be completely out of her reach. She curled herself into the pillow, clutching onto the last of his essence. She had been awake for hours watching the clock tick by, drowning in the silence of her home. A silence she knew was her new prison, a silence where the sentence was never hearing Red’s voice again, a silence which she would never escape from. A silence that spelled widow. 

Kitty watched the sun start to paint her room. It made her sick to see the sun come up again on a new day. That was the horror of losing someone, the world kept turning even if for you it had stopped. She closed her eyes against the birth of a new day, another sun up, which meant one more day added to how long Red had been gone. Kitty squeezed her eyes tighter, she wanted the life that she had been living minutes before she saw Red alive for the last time. 

_ They had been in the kitchen having breakfast, Kitty was planning to go shopping for a present for Devon’s upcoming birthday. It caused Kitty to smile to think of Devon, who was a sweetheart. She loved her daughter-in-law, she was perfect for her baby boy. It made her so happy to see Eric settled and loved. Kitty had asked Red what his plans were for the day, and he said he was going to work on the Corvette. His face got a smile on it, and a softness overcame him. Before he even said it, Kitty knew he was going to say something about Jackie. He only got that expression, when he talked about their adopted daughter. He was such a softie, even if he pretended he wasn’t.  _

_ “I’m going to call Jackie later and see if she wants to go to a car show with me this weekend. I bet at least a few of our grandkids will want to tag along….but what can you do.”  _

_ He smirked at her, but she knew he loved that Jackson, SJ, and Scarlet were into cars. Heidi, was all hers. She was never far from Kitty, and she loved to spoil her. Kitty figured it was only fair, at least one of her grandchildren liked her more than Red. It made her silently laugh that the man who claimed to hate everyone, was the one who had Grandchildren who worshipped him.  _

_ “I’m going to get out there and get to work. Love you Kitty.”  _

_ He had smiled at her, clucked her chin and headed out to the garage. The next time she saw him he was slumped over the wheel of the Corvette, and was already gone.  _

She opened her eyes to the sun that refused to listen to her inner wish, that it would stop burning on a new day. Kitty didn’t want new days, she just wanted her days with Red. Kitty knew a secret that most people didn’t understand, but it was a cold, hard truth, and she currently understood this truth with terrible clarity. Your life doesn't belong to you. It belongs to all the people who love you. It belongs to those who count on your heartbeat to make it through a day. When you die, it isn’t you left behind to deal with the aftermath, it’s the people who love you most. Red wasn’t here to deal with the clawing hollowness in her heart. He wasn’t here to witness his children’s shocked and horrified faces. It wasn’t him that would stare at his empty chair. It wasn’t him that would have a bed without a partner. It wasn’t him that would miss the love that only he could give. Red’s life had belonged to them, and now it was gone. Kitty reached out again to the carven of absence that was Red’s side of bed. It was now bathed in the sun that refused to listen to her pleas. She spoke to the empty side of the bed, the same as she had every day of her marriage,

_ “Good Morning Red, I love You.” _

Kitty got out of bed, and rose to face another day. A day where her babies were coming home to break the silence. A day that would be filled with tears and hurt. Another day without Red. 

  
  
  
  



	6. Ghosts of Yesterday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eric and Hyde come home to face the house that built them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to note that I don't end up addressing Laurie in this story. I didn't know how to fit her in with my storyline. Truly, she just "disappears" in the show so I decided to spend too much time trying to get her home for the funeral.

Eric pulled the Vista Cruiser into the driveway of his childhood home, it was just shy of 9 a.m. It was just him and Hyde. Jackie, Devon and the kids were following behind shortly. He and Devon had talked last night, and decided he needed to have a moment alone in the house without the kids or her. Devon had pulled him down to her chest,stroked his hair, and whispered,

_ “Whatever you need love. Let me take care of Jackie and the kids. I think you and Hyde need a few moments with your mom.” _

Jackie, was unhappy about being left behind without Hyde. Nothing showed Hyde’s devotion more to him in this terrible time, than Hyde not saying a word about being parted from Jackie. He had glimpsed the instant panic in Hyde’s eyes, but he had simply said,

_ “That’s Cool.” _

Eric inwardly rolled his eyes, those two could still be annoying with their insistence they not be parted. You would think after 20 years they would have gotten over the time they had been apart, but that was far from the case. Despite, Hyde’s unease at leaving Jackie when she was unglued, he had agreed it was probably for the best if they went ahead first. Hyde had told him privately it would probably be helpful for Jackie to spend some time with Devon. Devon seemed to have a calming effect on Jackie. Truly, Devon had that effect on everyone, she was like a soft breeze. No matter how much Jackie annoyed the complete and total crap out of him, he would always be grateful for her bossy interference in his life. Devon was his life changing miracle, and Jackie was who granted him that miracle. 

They were sitting in the driveway. Not a word had passed between them, neither of them needed to say it. They were far from ready to walk into the house, and not see the man who influenced them both beyond measure. Eric didn’t know how to do this. His mom was counting on him, and he was failing her, but he couldn’t bring himself to get out of the car. 

Hyde sat in a car he had spent nearly all his life in. He never said a word to Eric about driving this dinosaur and having Jackie keep it maintained. He understood the need to keep the Cruiser. He understood the need to have a positive connection to who they all used to be. So many of their memories were destroyed by Donna and Kelso, he understood with keen precision why Eric kept the Cruiser. He knew Eric wasn’t going to get out without something to crack the moment.

“20 bucks, and having to hug him first, says Bob comes over in the first 10 minutes, crying and sporting some crazy shirt.”

Hyde said it so dryly that Eric started laughing. He glanced over at his friend, who had his trademark smirk on his face, and felt oddly comforted by Hyde’s smart ass way of dealing with things. It gave him the courage to get out of the car. He moved to the door, and sensed Hyde directly behind him. Eric closed his eyes, and pulled the door open and called

“Mom, we’re home.” Hyde followed with “Hey, Mrs. Forman.”

* * *

Kitty Forman heard her sons’ voice coming from the kitchen and felt her heart clutch. There was a time when their voices were fixtures in the house. Her house had never been quiet. Eric’s whole gang of friends had practically lived in their basement. She had feed them, cleaned up after them, nursed injuries, wiped tears, and been their mom. She had always loved it. It had driven Red crazy to have all the kids in the house, but deep down she knew he liked he could keep an eye on them. She missed the chaos. Kitty had never liked the quiet, and now it seemed like the quiet would suffocate her. Her house had changed significantly when Steven had left with Jackie the night before her wedding with Michael. Red had banned Michael and Donna from the house, and Eric had been lost without Steven. For so long, she had despaired at not knowing where her second son was. Kitty had loved Steven from the minute Eric drug him home for the first time. He was then, and still was such a sweet boy. He had always been hers, and he always been incredibly loving with her. She knew then, and knew now, that she was one of the few people who got to witness the soft side of Steven Hyde. She knew that part of the reason she gravitated towards Steven was because he was so much like Red. She smiled wistfully, at how Red and Steven were identical in their devotion to Jackie. 

When Steven and Jackie had disappeared, Red had been unhappy not knowing how Jackie was. He had loved that girl with his surly but huge heart, and she knew that Jackie was going to be far from okay when she came through the door. Kitty was choosing to not focus on her own grief. Right now, it was easier for her to focus on the kids, which she had been doing for decades. 

She heard the swinging door open from the kitchen, and there they were. Eric in front, with Steven immediately behind. Seeing them like this, like she had so many times before, caused her eyes to tear up. 

“Mom?” Eric asked as he observed his mom sitting quietly on the couch, not answering his initial call. 

“BOYS!” she popped up and ran to them. 

She wrapped her arms around Eric, and hugged him with all the love in her heart. Eric held his mom tight. Desperately trying to not look at his father’s empty chair. He hadn’t spent much time at home since he moved to Madison to be closer to Hyde, but he still came home occasionally. His parents were up at least once a week to visit. They understood neither he nor Hyde were comfortable coming home. Hyde had only been back the one time when he tried to kill Kelso, and Jackie hadn’t stepped foot in the house since the terrible night either.

“Eric, how are you?” his mother asked.

Before he could answer Hyde broke through quietly.

“I’m going to give you guys a minute.” 

He turned and went into the kitchen, leaving Eric and Mrs. Forman alone before they could ask him to stay. He felt strongly they needed a moment without him.

Eric didn’t know what to say to his mom’s question. He tried to muster up words to describe how he felt, but there weren’t words for his current churning emotions. He said what was the truth,

“I don’t know Mom.”

Kitty looked up at her son, and saw his face ravaged by the loss of his father, and felt her own pain rushing to the surface. She hugged him tighter, using the physical contact like a life raft to her sanity. 

Eric felt his mom, pull him tighter, and he knew he had to ask. 

“Mom….. How are you?”

Kitty didn’t know either how to explain what it meant to lose the man who was the love of her life. How did a person put that into words? How did she tell her son that she would never be the same? She didn’t think she could, so she told him a truth that would never become a lie,

“I miss him so much Eric.”

She began to cry softly into her son’s chest. Eric gently rubbed her back, and whispered.

“I know mom, I know.”

* * *

Hyde scanned the kitchen. It had not changed much. He could appreciate updates here and there, but essential it was untouched by time. He didn’t know if he found that comforting or if it hurt more to see it like he left it yesterday. His eyes fell on the kitchen table. It was still in perfect shape. He couldn’t help but marvel on how it stayed so unmarred, being 30 plus years old. He found himself drawn to his seat. Hyde dropped into a chair that could tell a thousand stories. He forcefully kept his head straight. He wouldn't look at Red’s spot. Observing his empty spot in the living room had been like hearing the news again. He needed these moments alone, so he can handle being there for the rest of them.

A knock pulled Hyde away from his moment of peace. A smirky smile crawled across his face. He knew it. He knew Bob would be over. He turned around and the smile died instantly. There stood Donna. He glanced quickly toward the living room, making sure Eric or Mrs. Forman didn’t hear the knock. He was up out of the chair, out the door and blocking it with his body. This he knew how to do and how to handle. He had stepped in front of Eric countless times to protect him. He would do this with joy.

His eyes narrowed at the woman before him. Hyde once considered her one of his most trusted friends. He had nothing but contempt for her now.

“Leave Donna” It’s all he said, but his voice was dripping with malice, his eyes glittering with caged rage

Unlike Kelso, Donna had only tangled with Hyde briefly after her world was trashed. She was well aware he almost killed her ex-husband, she had been there for that shit show. Still, she had thought time would have lessened Hyde’s feelings. She could see Kelso had not been exaggerating. Hyde was unmoved.

“I’m here to tell Mrs. Forman, how sorry I am.” She tried to step around him. Hyde stepped directly in front her.

“The hell you are. You’re here to see Eric. Don’t bullshit me Donna.” 

His unblinking face, lit up the kindling that was her bitterness. 

“I don’t know who you think you are, but you can’t stop me from letting a family I’ve known my whole life how sorry I am.”

Hyde sensed the black boil up. He welcomed it. It was better than the terrible grief that he had locked down in his heart from losing Red. 

“Who I am Donna? I’m the guy whose life you fucked with. I’m the guy who suffered at the hands of your crazy idea that you got to decide who belonged together. I’m the guy who is best friends with the guy, who had his heart broken by you. I’m the guy who is married to the woman who believed you were her best friend, only to find out you are a manipulative bitch. If you think I’m going to let you hurt anyone I love ever again. You never knew me.”

Donna’s own temper was flaring at this immovable mountain in front her. As long as Hyde was anywhere near Eric she wouldn’t get anywhere near him.

“You son of a bitch. How dare you!”

Hyde curled his lips into a snarl,

“I can’t stop you from attending the funeral, but you better listen to what I’m about to say. If you upset, mess with or attempt to fuck with Eric or his wife Devon, I won’t stand in front of the wrath of God in the form of Jackie that will be unleashed on you. She loves Devon and she loves Eric. I’ll watch her rip you apart like a spectator sport. And Donna…. If you even cause a moment of distress in Jackie, I’ll make you wish you ever knew me. Stay the fuck away.”

Donna searched Hyde’s eyes, and there was nothing but flat hate for her. There wasn’t even a spark of who they used to be . Donna still felt hurt in her heart at losing Eric and it killed her that he had ended up so happy. She wanted to see in his eyes that he still thought of her. She still wanted to recognize what they were to each other. Staring into Hyde’s raw and unyielding eyes, she knew he would never allow her near Eric. 

She shot daggers at Hyde and said “Fuck You” She marched down the driveway to her car. Hyde watched her drive away, and took a deep breath of relief. 10 minutes later Jackie, Devon and the kids pulled into the drive. Thank God they had come later. He wasn’t sure Jackie could have not killed Donna on sight. 

He watched his family get out of the car, and he smiled at them. His family was more than Jackie, Scarlet, and SJ. Devon, Jackson, and Heidi, they belonged to him as well. He would do anything for them. These were his people. He moved towards them, and pulled Jackie in his arms. He breathed in sweet relief. This was going to be hell, but for her and all of them…. He would gladly take the trip. 

  
  
  



	7. Even Giants Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red's family comes face to face with the worst truth there is..... even the mighty and the strongest leave us. Hyde finally has no one left to comfort and must confront the grief in his own heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been the hardest thing I have ever written. I know parts of this are clunky and probably could be better, but grief is like that..... it doesn't always flow the way we want it to. I know this has also been a pretty sad chronicle, and not really a feel good story, but we will find the Hyde Family dealing with happier events in the next Chronicle. 
> 
> To those who read my work regularly, I appreciate you deeply. 
> 
> Somewhere Along The Way and High on Summer have updates coming soon.

The House was quiet, and there was nothing left to stop his thoughts from swirling to his father. His absence was loud, almost deafening. It was pounding in his head, preventing him from finding any peace. It was strange to him to be in his old house with his family and Hyde’s. The kids were all sleeping downstairs. Now that was a trip, watching his kids and Hyde’s lounging around and goofing off in a space that had witnessed the entirety of his formative years. He was in his old room, stuffed into his bed with Devon. He didn’t care about the tight fit, holding her close right now felt like a sanctuary. Despite the calm she helped him achieve, it was near impossible for him to find rest. Eric got up, and quietly padded down the stairs, he absolutely couldn’t sleep. He made sure he was near silent, so he didn’t disturb the house, and he didn’t want to wake Hyde.

Being friends with Hyde for six thousands years, he knew that he was a light sleeper. He didn’t want to disturb him. If Hyde heard someone moving around, he would get up right away to check. It made him smile a little, the guy who always claimed to not care was the guy who cared more than his heart could hold. Time had not softened Hyde’s protective nature, in fact it had gotten worse. Now he had more to worry about on top of Jackie and him, he had all the kids, and though he would never admit it, Hyde was incredibly fond of Devon. Devon seemed to bring out the softer side of his best friend. In all the years, he had known and been with Devon, he wasn’t sure she had ever witnessed Hyde get angry (which was a minor miracle) or heard him even raise his voice.

Eric had once tried to talk about Hyde’s temper with Devon, and she had refused to believe it. He had even drug Jackie over for back up, hell he made SJ come over and tell her how grouchy Hyde could be. She had merely smiled her sweet smile and said 

_“He’s so sweet, I truly can’t believe it.”_

Devon had patted his hand, and walked away. They had all laughed, sweet was hardly the word he would use to describe his oldest friend. That is what he loved about Devon, she only saw the good in people. Her heart simply wasn’t made to find fault. Despite, how badly his heart felt right now, he couldn’t help but smile at the thought of her. She was his everything. 

Eric ambled down the back hallway steps and shuffled into the kitchen and nearly jumped out of his skin. There in his spot for all meals was Hyde, only illuminated by the soft beam from the light over the kitchen sink.

Eric knew he shouldn’t be surprised Hyde was awake at 1 o’clock in the morning, sitting silent, but he was. He looked at him and said quietly,

“Hey, man, what are you doing down here?”

He watched Hyde sigh, and he barely nodded his head outside towards the garage. Eric could see that the garage light was on, and at first he didn’t get it.

He gave Hyde a confused gaze. Hyde sighed again and softly said,

“Jackie, is out there. I’m giving her some space, but I won’t go to bed until she comes in and goes up with me.”

Eric could see the worry etched on Hyde’s face. He loved Devon, and he knew that Devon loved him, but what Jackie and Hyde had was about survival. They simply couldn’t be whole without each other, and if one was in pain the other suffered greatly as well. Eric KNEW Hyde was upset about Red. He could glimpse the grief masked under the resolute,  _ I will take care of, and protect all persona, _ but he knew Hyde wouldn’t crack. As long as any of them needed someone to be the wall against the world, Hyde would stand and defend. Eric also knew that Hyde would physically be unable to rest or grieve until Jackie was on better ground. He knew that Hyde was also doing that with him. 

“I’m going to go out there in a few minutes and bring her in.” Hyde said when Eric didn’t respond to his initial answer. 

Eric felt a burning desire at that moment to lift the burden he placed on Hyde’s shoulders by asking him to take care of everything. 

“Why don’t you let me go out there and bring her in?” 

Hyde simply nodded and Eric stepped out into the night.

* * *

Jackie had not been able to settle at all since she stepped into a house that long detected her absence. The last 20 years of her life had taken place in Madison. Once Steven got over the fear that Kelso would hunt them down and steal her, Red and Kitty had always come to them. She had never forgotten her memories of Red from her childhood, but they had long been shuffled to the back of her heart. When she thought about Red, she usually thought of the day she laid her head on his shoulder and called him “Daddy” for the first time, but being back brought all the tucked away memories slamming back. Jackie sat curled up in the Corvette, lost in a sea of what he was to her……

_ The man who taught her on career day _

_ The man who showed her what it meant to get her hands dirty under a car _

_ The man who held her tight when Kelso abandoned her for California _

_ The man who sent her away to heal after Steven broke her  _

_ The man who held her children minutes after they were born _

_ The man who had saved Steven _

_ The man who was the only father she really ever had _

She could still smell him in the car, she wanted to wrap herself in it, already worried she would never smell him again. Jackie had never considered life without Red Forman, and now it was a reality she couldn’t escape. All she could do was lay her head on the steering wheel, and wish this was a nightmare.

Eric sighed, there in his father’s Corvette was Jackie. Her head was down laying on her arms across the steering wheel, and she was softly weeping. 

Eric had seen Jackie in just about every state of emotion. He had seen her annoyingly giddy, obnoxiously excited, shin kicking angry, and he had seen her cry, Hell, he had witnessed her tears of desperation, but this was something deeper,. This was a Jackie crying for her father. This was a completely heartbroken Jackie, and her quiet weeping was terrible. A very drunk Hyde once told him that the worst sound on earth was a heartbroken Jackie. He wasn’t kidding, listening to her cry was awful, and now he knew why Hyde did everything he could to make sure she was never sad. 

Eric pushed into the garage, and walked quietly to the Corvette and said her name no more than a whisper. 

“Jackie.”

Jackie’s head snapped up, and there stood Eric. She hadn’t spent much time with him, actually any. She had been avoiding him, what could she say to him….

  
  


Jackie didn’t have words for Eric. She didn’t have them herself. How the hell could she offer comfort to him? She didn’t know what possessed her to come out to the space that defined her and Red. To the place that he taught her so many things, held her, and told her to get her shit together. She couldn’t feel him in the house, that wasn’t her place with him. So she had come out here looking for his presence. As soon as she saw the Corvette, she knew she had to get in. It still smelled like him, his rag for working was on the seat, and in the console was his log for when he had changed the oil. It was too much, and she had crumbled into herself, as she mourned the only man who never let her down. Ever. 

All of that trapped in her heart caused her to be mute, all she could do was stare at Eric. He seemed to be in a trance as well, as he just stood there studying her, like she had the answer to all this. She watched him take a shuddering breath in, and then he said

“Come here, devil.” 

Eric spread out his arms to her, and Jackie flew into his arms without hesitation. Eric grabbed Jackie tight and held onto her with everything he had. In that pristine garage his father loved and spent hours in, he realized Jackie was more of a sister to him than Laurie ever was or would be. Jackie drove him up the fucking wall, they fought, teased, got on each other’s nerves, but when the chips were down they would do anything for each other. In his arms was the person who truly suffered the loss of his father as deeply as he did…... even more so. 

As he rubbed her back to quiet her tears, Eric told her the truth.

“He loved you, Jackie. He was soft with no one like he was you. When you and Hyde left, and he didn’t know where you were…. He was heartbroken. The happiest I’ve ever seen him was when we drove to that tiny apartment of yours, so he could see you the first time. You were the smart one, the useful one, the one who wasn’t a dumbass, and most of all you were his daughter.”

He held her until her tears went silent, and then she broke apart from him.

“Eric, I know he called you a dumbass and gave you a hard time, but I don’t think you know how proud of you he was. He adored Devon. Inside that Corvette in his console is a picture of you and the kids. He had you with him in his favorite space. He loved you.”

He pulled her back into a fierce hug, and he let out all the tears that had been trapped. Together Jackie and Eric, who never wanted to be friends, didn’t want to care about each other, hardly understood each other became two people who understood perfectly. The Devil and The Geek became two people who respected, cared about, loved and mourned with each other. No one would have taken the bet, but Jackie Burkhart Hyde and Eric Forman became brother and sister. 

Eric hugged Jackie one more time, and started to pull Jackie out of the garage.

“Let’s go in. You know your husband won’t budge until you and I are both in the house.” 

Jackie kissed his cheek and stepped ahead of him and slipped into the kitchen. He watched her fold her body into Hyde’s embrace. He turned back around, and stared at the garage one more time, as he hit the light before he closed the door, he whispered

“I love you Dad, it will never be the same without you.” 

He shut the door and walked towards the kitchen where he knew a friend who was a brother was waiting for him. 

* * *

They were home again. After a long week of holding the world together, he simply was exhausted. Hyde sat again alone in the kitchen in the soft light from over the stove and struggled to find some peace, so he could get some fucking sleep. He closed his eyes and contemplated his actions over the last week. He wanted to believe that Red would be proud of him for how he kept it together for everyone. He wanted to believe that he conducted himself in the way Red would have if it had been him leading the family. All Hyde had ever wanted in life was to be half the man Red Forman was, he owed that man his life. It had been a hellish week of emotion, which under the best of circumstances was not something Hyde excelled at. 

There was nothing left to do. Hyde had helped plan the visitation, the funeral, and the reception afterwards. He kept a stern eye on Jackie and Eric, and made sure he was never far from Kitty. He had checked in with the kids constantly, and made sure that they weren’t dwelling. He made sure that Scarlet was eating and the SJ wasn’t shutting down. It had made him smile to see them all, keeping Heidi entertained. They were all good kids, and he made sure that Scarlet gave Jackson and SJ some time by themselves. He knew the Scarlet could be smothering when she was worried, and he knew SJ would hate that. Hyde had cleaned out Red’s closet, and packed up all the stuff Kitty couldn’t bear to look at or deal with at this moment. Now, it was all done, and there was nothing left for him to take care of, and his grief had nothing to keep it at bay.

Hyde pressed his thumbs into his eyes, in a desperate attempt to keep the tears in. He had buried his father this week. Yes, WB was his biological father, but his dad was Red Forman. He had never had a Dad, until Red took him in. It hollowed him out to think he was back to not having a dad. It sliced at him that the man he respected, without reservation, was simply gone. Respect was something tough for Hyde to give, and if he gave it you must have earned it. He couldn’t remember a time in his life that he hadn’t respected or heeded Red. Red the guy who took care of him when it was unfathomable. Red was the one who rode his ass, and refused to let him become his parents. Hyde wasn't stupid, he knew that Red had saved his life when he took him out of that fucking shack of a house his mom had left him in. 

Hyde wanted to break things. He wanted to drink. He wanted to fight someone until they hurt as fucking bad as he did. He wanted his fucking dad back. At that last thought, tears that felt like acid started to fall. As the first tears hit his cheeks, his eyes flew open because the softest of sounds echoed like a bullet in the silent kitchen. 

There stood Jackie, gazing at him with all the love she had in her eyes for him. Even after all these years, he couldn’t stand for her to see him like this. He put his hands over his face, but she was having none of it. Jackie moved quickly, pulled his hands away, and tucked herself on his lap. She wrapped herself around him, and gave him all the love that she had for him.

“I’m so sorry baby. He loved you too. I’m so sorry you lost your dad.” She crooned it in his ear, barely audible. Hyde grabbed her tightly, tucked his head into her raven hair, and let the raw grief fall from his heart. 

Buried in her hair, Hyde said her name nearly inaudible, 

“Jackie?”

It near killed her to hear his voice so slight and miserable, it tore at her that he had been keeping this all at bay for her, for all of them. She ran his fingers through his hair, something that she had done countless times to soothe him, and replied back softly,

“Yes, Baby?”

For a minute he said nothing, and then he replied with raw grief

“I want my dad back.”

She closed her eyes tight, and wished she could make his heart’s desire come true, but this time neither of them would get what they wanted.

“I know baby. I know.”

Hyde pulled her even closer, and mourned one of life’s worst lessons…..

_ That Even Giants fall.  _


End file.
